Wednesday, April 30, 2008

{This American Life}

Okay, it feels like forever since I've felt the heart wrenching torture of breaking up with someone you care about. I'm happily married now, so I don't need to worry about going through that again (thank goodness), but today I was listening to an episode of This American Life and it was on Break-Ups. Even if you are married or in a relationship, you have to listen to this episode!

The first part of it is about writer Starlee Kine on her breakup. She finds so much comfort in breakup songs that she decides to write one of her own.

These are a few of my favorite things she said...
"There is something so satisfying about listening to sad songs. They make you feel less alone- they don't judge you- in fact, they understand you. Before the breakup, I had no idea how much breakup music was out there, for example, every song ever written...or at least every third. But once you're heartbroken, you notice it everywhere. You find yourself in the supermarket, listening to a song you've heard before, but never really heard, thinking to yourself, 'It's just so true...'"

So much of what she said brought back memories of my own breakups. Thinking...no...knowing, that I would never, ever heal. Left wondering what happened, why it had to happen, wondering how long it would be before I finally felt normal again, and if I would ever love again. Of course, I did move on, and looking back, I'm grateful for those breakups. They taught me so much. With every break up, I learned what I wanted, and most importantly, I learned what I didn't want. I knew I wanted someone spiritual, someone kind and sensitive, someone manly who could fix things and help me build things- a mans man, someone patient and laid back, but not in a pushover way, someone compassionate, sexy, and fun- and you know what? I found him.

I wish I could go back in time and console myself during those hard times. Now I know why people always tell you, "Don't worry, it gets better", because it does get better. It gets better and better until you finally find what your looking for, which makes all those terrible breakups completely worth it in the end.

6 comments:

Samantha said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Samantha said...

SHAN!!!! Somehow I keep finding you. This is a sign that we are suppose to be friends forever! haha. Oh and Break ups suck! And makes me think of the past haha. I can look back and laugh now. Good to find you! AGAIN in the blogging world that I only just started. I love your blog! SO FUNNY!

Sarah Marie said...

I'm so happy for you that you found your perfect man-- you guys are so cute together! I'm happy that I found my boy, too!-- It IS great to know that it gets better... Yeah, in a way I'm glad I went through bad times in the past b/cuz otherwise you might not appreciate the good times you have now.

Ooh, and btw, we had the heat wave over the weekend-- a high of 89 and 94 but then it switched up and got all cold. On Tuesday the high was only 64! It's insane!!

Oh, and I think I've been to Rock Creek before. Usually my fam would go to Tuolemme Meadows but one summer we camped in Rock Creek. Doesn't that place have a really great pie place? Ha, I love that that's what I remember about it!

And thanks so much for your really sweet comment! :)

Lisa K said...

I love NPR and This American Life!!

BECKY said...

This was SUCH a beautifully written post. I've felt the same feelings. KNOWING that life would never go on and that you'd never find someone else. And hating when people said, "you'll find someone new" and thinking in your head, "yeah freaking right... you can't even know that." Breakups are so, so hard, but at the same time so wonderful because how bad would it be if we all married the first person we loved?

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